Crazy?  Me no way! Moving to Scotland? 

So a lot has happened and by that I mean like in my life and the past week I have not posted!! 
I have received my eviction letter and I have until 20th June to move out.
So I have been thinking, what if I leave Leeds? Yes it sounds crazy right?  Me moving from Leeds to Scotland with 5 kids alone.
But I believe it will be a new start something amazing for me and the kids.
Here there has not been many happy times infact 90% have been bad the other 10% have been all about the kids.
So what do I have to lose?  To me nothing I  don’t have anything to lose the kids have nothing to lose.
Well except I’ll be leaving or selling all my stuff and buying new things.
It’s something I think about more and more and each time I do I’m me convinced it’s the right thing to do.  
So am I crazy?  No or maybe I am but I want to give my kids a better life

What a busy roller-coaster time 

That right above is me and has been now for 17 days. At the start I was nervous scared even that I would not be able to do it alone.
But not too far into it I realised I had already been doing it alone for 11 years the biggest difference was most days I don’t have adult conversation except for online!!   But that is sometimes the next conversations ever!! 
Daily I get people messaging me on Facebook asking how I am doing and coping!!  That right there is my support network these people I have built relationships with care about it!! 
So since then, well let’s just say again landlord threatened eviction I told him to go ahead I want out.  However it didn’t happen.
So what was my choices? Yes that’s right report my issues to the local council amazingly 3 days after they rang him I received the letter of eviction!! 
No contact from him yet about the repairs.  He only has 28 days to do them and believe me after his abuse and threats.  I will be reporting him for not doing the work! 
Along with this I had a scare Friday evening!   Mia came out of school unwell and unable to breath.  This was the first time that it’s happened while I am living alone.
I was not scared of what would happen or been alone and dealing with it.  I was scared I would have to call a ambulance and have my 6 year old leave without mummy or daddy at her side! 
Anyone with a child who frequently gets ill will understand it is hard to leave them while you go to the shop or for some air.  So the thought of leaving them completely alone scared me so much.
I’m so grateful her dad came and watched the others while I took her.  After over 4 hours in a&e she had 40 puffs of her inhaler, steroids, nebuliser, oxygen and xrays.
Thankfully we got to go home that night!!   Which was amazing she perked up loads and the next day she was almost back to get complete usual self.
I will be posting most nights now!! 
It’s time I started embracing this change and using it to my advantage.

What a week! I made it to 81 days gamble free 

I have not posted in a while..

Kids holidays so I’m spending as much time as I can with them before they go back to school! 
Working as well yes I work from home which I love but I do need to do some work every day.
Along with that personally I have changed I am so much happier now any bad things that try to get me down I am able to handle them and push them out my mind.
I have achieved so much and I’m so happy my mind is clear more clear then it has been for years!   And I’m new stepping up and realising what things in my life are wrong and need to go or be changed.
Life can not continue how it did before my addiction.  Clearly things in my past made me gamble and become addicted and those things need to change.
Today is day 81 of no gambling!!  My first time stopping with little support and I am achieving it! In not so long it will be 3 months! 
Changes are coming!! 
Tomorrow’s post is not to be missed you will see just why things got so bad for me!
Here’s a few pictures from this past week.

Easter Holiday Fun

In the holiday’s kids get so bored because Monday-Friday they have structure at school all day.  It is a time where they are constantly kept busy, Working, Playing, Creating and having fun.


At home there is nothing!  So here is, some things to help you get the most out of your easter holidays but also keep the children active!


So start with a timetable!  Yes, that is right a timetable,  This will fit all your plans, activities and meal times into one place but most importantly with this, you can create space for some me time so you do not get so stressed!


Be realistic with this though don’t put 8am breakfast if you know your kids will be up at 6:30 or you will all be asleep until 10am for the reason the whole schedule will shift!


So I will share my day two schedule I do things before the kids wake but you will get the idea.  You will see two choices the first is if the weather is nice second if it is not!


Kids awake 7-8am Breakfast by 9am, Kids dressed by 9:45

10 AM Music kids dancing/Kids playing in garden

11:30 AM kids in and get ready for dinner, and help prepare food

12:30 30 minutes of Screen time

1 PM Kids crafting, Cutting and sticking/Walk to the local park with ball, hula hoops etc

3PM Movie time  3pm-3:30 quiet time for mum then cook

4:45 Tea Time

5:30 Kids 30 minute screen time and reading school books

6:30 bed time


It might seem simple but you will be amazed by how long kids will enjoy dancing around the living room for! The idea is to get them up and active as early as possible to burn some fuel and get them a little calmer for after dinner!


Kids helping with dinner is also another amazing thing!  Having 5 kids it is harder but each one can help, One passes you the ingredients, one get them out the cupboards etc one puts the trimmings in the bin!


You really can get your kids to help and they will love it!


So some more ideas?


Messy play this is something even my 10-year-old enjoys paper all over the floor so its covered and playing with hands, feet etc.  Obviously, use old clothing!  My kids loved rolling around in the paint!  You see if you have enough paint and patience for the cleaning after your kids would stay there all day painting!


£1 Stores!  To many people spend £3 on plastic bats and balls when most £1 stores have them in easter holidays I believe in other countries it is called dollar shop etc.  But for £10 you can get 10 different outdoor toys!  Water guns another thing which kids will play with for hours but again if you do not have a outside tape you need patience for cleaning your floors! Same you can get these from £1 stores.


In the UK the cinema is amazing!  Vue mini mornings you only get one movie which isn’t amazing but if I was to go any other time or to see any other film that isn’t a mini morning it would cost me over £60!! Seriously for a 1 hour 45-minute film!  With mini mornings I believe for all 6 of us it would be £12 what a bargain!!


You see 2 weeks is not a long time!  Lets list some ideas below!


Playing in garden

Messy paint play

Cutting and sticking

30 minutes of screen time

Storytime each child takes turns to pick a book


Local park

Playing field with ball and other outside games

Movie day

Paddling pool

Water guns

Make your own pizzas

Create a play (Kids will spend all day rehearsing before showing you the final play)

Create puppets and a play

Write your own stories

Give kids a choice what would you like to do?






Stress control course and huge changes 

So today was day one of this 6 week course.  Every Monday I go to the course and get new information to help control stress.
But before that I started implementing a morning wake up routine and schedule! 
5am my Alarm rang I could easily have switched it off for another hour and half but no I got straight up! 

Drank a full glass of water splashed my face with water to help wake me up.

Then meditation followed by exercise.

Light reading, writing, affirmations and Visualisation.
I felt great and ready to achieve my day and handle anything that tried to knock me down!  
My morning was less stressful I even got the kids meditating.

It is never too early to start them with a good habit that can help them so much in life! 

So then along to the course I went.

Apparently depression and anxiety are closely linked to stress and often been able to control some of your stress can actually help with your anxiety and depression as well.

It’s not like counseling, no sharing stories etc just information on how to basically be your own counsellor! 
So far it seems good we get a booklet each week to take home read through and complete and try implement into our lives to help reduce stress and in turn help with anxiety and depression.

I have even started my new clean healthy eating again.

Tomorrow is day 2 of the new me! Up early with some be time to do my meditation and other important things.

Followed by a day keeping busy, working and relaxing! 

Hospital appointment, School Visit, Birthday and Sickness bug!

What fun these last few days have been!

Due to one of the twins been sick Sunday, she was off from school Monday.  So we had a trip to our local Tesco store to get some groceries.  We then came home and waited for the others to finish school.  Monday was a quiet day in general TomorrowI planned a trip into town in the morning to finish Birthday shopping for the youngest.  Again taking Elysa as she could not go back to school till Wednesday.


Well, Tuesday came!  We dropped Sophia at nursery and the other 3 kids at School.  We went straight into town and did some shopping but I got a phone call around 10:15 saying Sophia had to come home.  So off we went rushing to finish and get the bus to the nursery.

When we got to the nursery, I was told she had Diarrhea and would have to stay off for 48 hours at minimum after it cleared!  I just hoped she did not get sick and spoil her birthday which was the next day.

So we went home spent the day the same pretty much in the house wrapping her presents.  Watching films and cuddling until it was time to pick kids up.


Wednesday Birthday!  So I woke up Wednesday got downstairs and got her presents sorted.  She came down and opened them excited and having fun.  No disappointment that I had not bought her any Teletubbies toy.

Around 7:50 she started saying she felt sick and asking for the bucket! Yes, a just turned 3-year-old asking for the sick bucket!!



I felt awful, I took the kids to school came back and we cuddled and watched a film followed by some creative play with her new craft stuff she got for her birthday.


By around 4 o’clock I myself was not feeling great but put it down to stress and not eating well.  I couldn’t get ill!  Mia has her appointment at the hospital with ENT the next day and I had to visit my son’s high school he got accepted into!


But waking up around 11:30 I was far from OK!  Sick and diarrhea had hit me as well I was hoping it would pass quickly!  However, I ended up partly sleeping on a chair in the living room.  I say partly sleeping cause I fell asleep around 5:45 to be awakened at 6 am with the kids!  My partner took them to school and I tried to sleep with Sophia most of the day as she still was not well!  Canceling the hospital appointment and school visit. Still, ill Thursday night, however, waking up Friday feeling a lot better.  So I took a trip to Tesco and did some shopping.


Hopefully, next week goes a little better! I mean I should be saying hopefully it will only be us three who get the sickness bug and none of the other kids!  Otherwise yes that is right another whole week of sickness bug in the house and unable to go out not to mention the fact its mothers day soon!

The silly things strangers ask!

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It makes me laugh really I mean literally laugh I used to get annoyed been pregnant with one baby the questions people ask and the comments after having the baby.

But that is just a small blip of what someone gets if they have twins or multiples!

You always get the how far gone are you questions no matter what and been pregnant with one is tiring enough answering that exact same question multiple times a day!

Then towards 38 weeks you get the “You must be close now your huge” “Isn’t he here yet?” Statements! Only a couple of weeks though you need to hear these.

But for twin mums wow you can not imagine the amount of times you get stopped and questioned!  Its like a pregnancy police check every 5 people you walk past!

“Wow your huge when are you due?”  My response ended up been “What do you mean I am huge I am only 3 months pregnant”  This made them quickly walk away looking at me like I was crazy.

“Is there really only two in there?”  I started responding no actually there is just 1 they measured the same baby twice thinking there was two”

Hitting the 4-5 months mark what fun that is!  You get the whole “Wow your ready to drop” my response “Yeah its been 4 months I am fed up now”

You see having one baby you don’t get that many questions until the very end when your looking like your full term!  With twins you look full term around 4 months pregnant so you have 5 months of these questions!

The assumption I hated was “Surely they will give you a c-section your so small!”  Thanks just because of my size you assume I can not push out a baby like everyone else!

What ever you do DO NOT SAY IT IS TWINS!

I made this mistake a few times, When people assumed I was ready to drop when I was just 4 months gone!  This unleashed a whole huge questionnaire!

I love them T-Shirts!  Saying things like YES I am having twins do not ask, or Yes there is only two in here. it kind of stops the questions before they even get chance to ask!

Now lets talk about the questions you get after having the babies some are just ignorance others have you stood there thinking “Are you freaking kidding me?  Did you really just ask me that?”

So a few I encountered after having my twins.

“How cute a boy and girl are they twins?”  Both wearing matching pink coats and clothing!  My response “No they are both boys I just like dressing them as girls”  I mean seriously!! Wearing pink dresses and you assume one is a boy?

“Double Trouble”  Sorry but if you have 2 kids of different ages you still have double trouble only one is older and wiser and gets the younger one to do the work so they don’t get caught!

“Are they natural?”  At first I would look stunned and say “yes” But after a while it is actually quit offensive so soon I replied “No sorry they where made in test tubes and incubators until full term then I adopted” The looks I got !  I mean no matter how they where conceived they are still natural!

“Which is the evil twin?”  I have yes been asked this!  How the hell do you respond to this?  When they was babies I just laughed awkwardly and walked away quickly.  But as one twin started getting attitude and mastered evil eyes Oh what fun we had!

I would say “She is watch her” Pointing to the wrong twin while the other was sat there giving the death stare and a evil chuckle! Then I would reply “Oh no wait it got passed onto her now”

I mean seriously why would you ask that?  Which is the evil twin? None do people really believe one twin is good and one is evil?  Apparently so!

So here is a few more questions you get.

“Are they identical”

“Are they twins?” (reply yes) “How old is she?” (reply one) “So sweet how old is her twin?” Erm 35???

“You have your hands full” No having twins as a doddle having 5 is a hands full!

“You look so worn out”  This honestly normally was said after I had a good nights sleep! Seriously I feel great and then someone says I look like crap Thanks!

“Do they have the same dad?”

“Are they yours?”

“Do they share the same birthday?”

The struggles of just going to the shop!  It is a 2 minute walk and took like 20 minutes!  Not because of the babies no no no because of strangers stopping you every minute to look at the babies! They are the same as other babies just 2!

So  what ever you do next time you see a pregnant lady or a mum of twins/multiples do not ask the stupid questions!  Think about how many times today they have already been asked it!

You can only imagine the questions I get asked walking down the street with these three!

I should point out no they are not really triplets and I am talking about them been twins!  The twins where 5 in this picture and their sister 4!  She is just catching up with them quickly!  And obviously now I get asked daily are they triplets!  So I have gone from the twins questions to triplets questions!

Here’s a few pictures of their first 2 years!  Who can relate?  Or did you get asked something I did not cover here?  Comment below.

It’s Messy It’s Fun It’s Been A Mum

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If you are someone who hates mess, unexpected accidents, blood, sick and drawing on walls you should always avoid been a mum!


Most things can be avoided but it would mean having you kids next to your feel every second of every day and lets be honest some days we just need a bit of time to hide in the toilet and have some peace and quiet.


A life of a mum should be fun it should be messy and it should be filled with accidents, crying, sickness, and well the thought of “WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?”


Now if I was to take a picture of all the walls and doors in my house not a single will have escaped the craws of my children and  the ink of their pens.  But that is kids right?  They have to experiment drawing on everything including the sofa and bed sheets oh and don’t forget the tv!  yes it already has pretty pictures on but you know kids they can make it look  better with a bit of pen!


So here are some of my messy times! WARNING SOME GRAPHIC CONTENT!

Some fun ones first!  Then we get the to unexpected, they “Why would you do that” and the “OMG I want to be sick!”


Avoiding fun messy play is not right kids should be free to do this while you are there helping them watching them!

Look at the smiles the concentration and happiness on their face!  Remember I said it should be with your supervision?


Well this one totally failed!


Splatted eggs on the floor!  A mum knows just how awful and frustrating this is eggs are one of the worse things to clean up!


Think that is funny?  How about this?

So who looks most innocent?  The baby says she did not go near the paint yet the evidence is on her!  The older girl insists she did not touch it the baby put it on her!  Now I am no expert but I am sure the baby would be a little more covered had she put it on her.

This was one of them times I was like “Why would you do this??”

Now there is some things you can not handle been a mum



That is the dreaded Illnesses, sickness bugs and everything in between! These can not be stopped with school nursery etc they are going to get sick at some point!


Then there is these the accidents that could be avoided had they just listened but you know what kids are kids they won’t!


Story one!  She was told a few times not to sit on the skateboard and push down the hill because her feet would get dragged back resulting in her face hitting the floor.

10 minutes later she decided mum’s not watching quick do it!  For that to happen!  Bust lip, blood everywhere, her white olaf jumper covered and still the next day she tried to do it again!


Story two every day every second actually they get told do not jump around on the sofa did they listen?? No so obviously falling off hitting her nose off the table resulted in this!  What happened the next day?  She started jumping on the sofa again!


No matter how many times a child gets hurt doing something fun that is dangerous as well they are going to keep trying to do it one because its fun and two because surely it won’t happen again right?


Then there is these types of not so accident accidents!


She looks fine right?  Maybe thinking her tooth hurts? hurt her leg? No this child has something wrong with her you can not see well not without a x-ray!  Deciding she was bored and wanting to go see her doctors and nurses at the hospital she put a bead up her nose!  YES A bead up her nose!


After explaining on the way to a&e how she was wasting their time and would not see her usual specialist and spending from 6pm-11pm in a&e she realized her plan did not work and got no fun out of it.


You see been a mum is not easy, it is not all about the first steps, first word, first day at school.  Its about the mess, the illnesses, the cuts, bruises, paint mishaps, wall drawings and everything else!  You need to embrace it and enjoy it because that is part of been a child growing up!  Without it your missing big steps in their childhood.


Motherhood is fun, exciting, exhausting, tiring,  tormentful, on edge, and stressing but every single bit of it is worth it if you let go of the worries and make sure you are there to show them things are wrong, right and cheer them up after a fall.

You can’t stick to a routine with 5 kids 

There is honestly no easy, simple or quick way of getting the 5 kids bathed.
Monday mornings are hectic so we are getting into order!  How??   Like this…
Sunday before 3pm

Get the kids to fold all their uniforms

Place uniforms on one of their shelves.

Next get coats hang them up on it

Then shoes next to uniform 

Hat scarf and gloves go next 

Then bags as well! 

Oh then clean underwear and pj’s!!

You see bathing them is a fight abs struggle not to bath them no but afterwards the fighting over which clothes they wear! 
So before they get it all sorted on their shelf then they have already chosen and minimises arguments a bit anyway.
Bathing them is fun of I bath the 2 and 4 year old the twins who are 6 moan because they want to go first.

But if the twins go first then it means leaving the 2yr old in the bath alone which I won’t do so means it takes longer.
If the twin go second I can be getting the other two dried and hair done while the twins get washed.
Do tonight was One at a time show never again!! First the argument of who goes first then followed by kids bored running in and out nearly smashing the glass shower door.
But having 2 in the bath at the same time causes arguments

” I want to be at top” ” your legs in the way ” ” you splashed me ” you get the gist lol 
You can only imagine when all 4 share.  The girls love bath bombs but imagine using 2-4 every time I bathed them I would need to make them myself at the cost they are! 
So yes routine helps but you can’t really expect it to go perfectly!! 
Mornings wow my aim is to have them all feed, dressed, shoes, coats etc by 8 am giving me 20 minutes to check everything but no we are only just ready by 8:25 most days will still make it on time but still causes way more stress then needed.
These shelves I love they are stylish for kids look fun and perfect for getting their stuff organised and get them started early.
My son is 10 and at the age where he gets his clothes sorted, bathed etc so he’s easy and simple.  Mornings no he likes to push is luck! 

Five kids is hectic, hair pulling, annoying constant mum for no real reason.
But it is amazing!! 

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