Erotica and BDSM

Now, I love erotica and I love erotica that features BDSM even more. My issue is though, I get right into a book or a series and it stops.

Just like that, no I don’t mean the story I mean the BDSM, the details, the items used it just stops and hits a wall, why?

Well, if you are like me, and you don’t get squeamish at reading about Genital clamps, or a woman being bound, and called a slut like some Submissives are, you’re probably noticing a lot of books, don’t and won’t call the lady a slut.
Why? Well, the answer is not all readers will like it, I get that. BDSM is not for everyone, some think they love BDSM but then when they read a book where the submissive is called a dirty little slut, by her Dom.

They instantly get put off, now part of BDSM, is also humiliation, and the words dirty little slut could be used in two ways, a form or humiliation or for the Submissives pleasure, yes some women do actually like to be called that and find it a turn on.
So, I have found a few books, that go as far as that, not many though. Again that is not necessarily because the author doesn’t know about that side, or they don’t like it. It purely is because once you step over that line, you can lose readers.
Understandable, not everyone likes it, just like not everyone likes erotica.
For, me some books miss out important parts of BDSM, because they are too afraid to write them in case they lose readers. I have read a lot of books, where there is no aftercare. Now most people into BDSM will know this, and often in books where the erotic scene ends, that is it. It has ending move on next chapter, it doesn’t show you the aftercare, how they do maybe lay together and talk, sit and discuss things, and get to know each other on a personal level.

Now, I have had a few people read book one of my series, some loved it.  Some said it didn’t go far enough.  Then the same people reading book two, some who loved book one still love book two, some have said they won’t finish it because it is degrading.  Now, as I said above, words like slut are used, but these words are often used in the real world of BDSM, and usually, it is a turn on for the women.

The people who complained, no your first book did not go far enough, have read book two and love it, waiting for book three to see what can unfold in it.

Erotica, BDSM, all things relating to these, are safe, good and nothing to be ashamed of.  If your reading a book and think, wow I love it, but what would they think.  Don’t, do not think about them you love it you read it!  Don’t be ashamed of enjoying something that people are not educated about so can’t mentally understand the attraction.

3 Comments Add yours

  1. dave94015 says:

    Reblogged this on dave94015 and commented:
    if you write about #bdsm, you may lose readers… Don’t be ashamed of enjoying something that people are not educated about so [they] can’t mentally understand the attraction.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. dave94015 says:

    self-censoring can be an impediment to writing gripping #bdsm scenes. You will always win a few and lose a few readers no matter how you write about bdsm.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Agree, I have people who love my first books but reading the samples of book two no longer like it, but then others love book two more.

      Like

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