Me fighting for everything 

Right now would be one of them days I would gamble without a second thought everything that is in the bank.
You see it didn’t start out to bad but then when 3pm hit it didn’t go good at all!   Waiting for the bus from 3:10 till 3:31 because none showed up so I did not get to school till 3:40!! So I was pretty much the last person there.
Getting home kids didn’t listen why would they after school is the hype time.  Eldest 10 fighting with all the girl as usual.

Then at around 4 one of the twins came running in Mia a bead up her nose and it’s stuck!!  6 years old and putting things up her nose!!
Checking I could not see it trying to get her to blow it out was also unsuccessful for about 20 minutes it seemed no one wanted to answer their phones!! 
Call 111 to be told she has to go in to a&e because it’s a choking hazard.

But obviously someone doesn’t care and made it perfectly clear they didn’t.  So I’m sat here 5 kids one needing to go to hospital and their dad doesn’t care.
Having a mini break down again crying trying to hide it from the kids feeling like total crap. There it was the thoughts you could gamble just once it will take the edge of the pain and upset away.
It so would but it wouldn’t be worth it!   At times I feel I’m alone I’m the one cleaning, cooking, paying bills, making cup of tea’s taking kids to school and back parents evening alone meetings with teachers with all the kids because no one will have them. 
I like to think I have support living with me but truth is its just me no one else here who cares enough to help or support me in anything in life but still expect me to do everything for them without them giving anything back in return.
It’s true what they say the people who love, care and trust the most are the ones who get hurt the most.

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